Snort Laugh Saturday: Breastfeeding Humor

I figured I'd just spell it out in the title.  This post is about breastfeeding, and if that's not your cup of tea, read no further. 

I'm what I like to call an "Avid Breastfeeder" as opposed to a "Militant Breastfeeder."  I'm all about helping women to breastfeed as long as both they and their baby want to: whether it's one month, or several years.  As long as mom and baby are happy, I'm happy.  If breastfeeding isn't working, and formula is, then great! And vice versa.  I just want mothers to feel empowered to make the choice that's right for them.

I have done extended breastfeeding with both of my biological children, and to this day, I wish I'd been able to breastfeed my adopted children.   Breastfeeding has been a wonderful bonding agent for me, a Mom who isn't naturally the "nurturing type."  (For anyone who knows me, they'll admit that's basically a huge understatment.)  I can be strict.  I can be stern.  I can be a disciplinarian.  But nurturing?  It doesn't usually come naturally, and that's why I loved breastfeeding.  It was probably the only area where "nurturing" came easily.  And for that, I thank the good Lord. 

Anyway, I'm linking to an article published in The DC Moms about a woman who was kicked out of a local DMV for breastfeeding.  Yeah.  Ridiculous.  You don't have to be a "Militant Breastfeeder" to be incensed on her behalf.  Anyway, if you want to read the whole story, it's entertaining.  However, what I want to highlight today is the author's final remarks, which, if you've ever been reprimanded yourself for breastfeeding in public, completely ring true, and may also make you laugh out loud:

"Oh, and for anyone who is offended by the sight of a woman breastfeeding? This former nursing mom suggests that you carry a light blanket with you and gently drape it over your head if a breastfeeding mother is nearby."

Touche!

The Right To Breastfeed
by Rebekah at DC Moms

Lastly, here's another funny breastfeeding cartoon.  It's PG-13ish, so I'm just linking to it.

~Ruthie

Anatomy 101

Our dog doesn't know it, but his life is about to change forever.  You see, he hasn't been neutered.  Yet.  But his appointment is already on the calendar, so it's a Sword of Damocles that he's blissfully unaware of.  I won't spoil these last few weeks of joyful intact-ness for him, by letting him in on the secret.

But with inquisitive boys around, his canine manliness hasn't gone unnoticed.  In fact, it's been the subject of several impromptu anatomy lessons.  So tonight, my nine year old son pointed to the dog's testicles, and asked me, "What is that?"  I was a bit surprised, since I assumed he knew what those were.  I simply stated, "Those are his testicles." 

My son responded with an equally perplexing, "What are testicles again?  His GUTS??"

A bit stymied, yet keeping my poker face, I replied (with a bit of circumlocution, in hopes that he'd "get it" since his five year old sister was there) "No, that is his scrotum."

At this, he suddenly perked up, and wordlessly bounded into the nearby bathroom--not ten paces away.  With the door wide open, we heard him bellow, "Where are my testicles, again???"

Side note: THANK GOD he at least had the sense to go in the bathroom.

At this point, my five year old daughter finally piped up, and shouted back in earnest sincerity, "Don't you know???  They are on your knuckles!"

Myths About Homeschoolers Video

Remember, I have a violent propensity for hopping on trends fashionably late.  Okay, fine.  Nix the fashionable part.  Just late. 

So, after this Youtube video has already been passed around a bit, I still can't resist posting it.  See, I, too was homeschooled.  Yes, even for high school.

And although I'm not a homeschooling Mom, this video makes me laugh, especially since my oldest two kids are "Sparkies" in Awana.  Enjoy.

Seven Lies About Homeschoolers

by Blimey Cow

The Post Where I Return From the (bloggospheric) Grave

...and other hyperbolic melodrama!

Sorry.

After my last post, I didn't get better. I stayed sick. For a month. In fact, I'm still not 100%.  Five minutes ago, I downed my nightly jigger of store-brand Nyquil, which should only improve the content of this post.  So aided by my drugs, I am finally up to posting again.

The other thing that happened is that I've had something new demanding a lot of my time. Well, someONE new, to be more specific.   It's been a wild and fun start to the new relationship, so I've been a little preoccupied. He's got auburn hair, and an incredible upper body.  We met online.  Here he is, with my oldest and my youngest kiddos.  The one in pink is particularly fond of him.  Scroll down to see him.

The story goes like this:  He was a rescue dog.  He was in need of a home because his previous family went through foreclosure and couldn't keep him.  They were moving into a condo, and had to re-home him.  Many people expressed interest in adopting him, but they clearly had bad intentions, and wanted to use him as a "guard dog" (or worse, "fighting dog.")  He's three years old and a wonderful family pet.  He is the sweetest soul, and although he just arrived before New Year's, he's already a part of the family. 

When he first arrived, we understood his name to be "Bertie."  So, we called him Bertie for several days, or "Bert," for short.  Only some of the kids couldn't quite get it right, and called him "Bergie," which would occasionally be pronounced "Vergie," or even, "Virgil."

And then we found out his name wasn't "Bertie" at all, but, rather, "Bentley."

So, now the good-natured fellow answers to all of the above names, and a month later he still gets called all of them.  The family is divided on which of his names we prefer, so he may always answer to all of them.  And that, like everything else, seems to be fine with him.

In answer to any questions, Bentley is a Staffordshire Terrier mix, which may include Staffordshire Bull Terrier, American Stafforshire Terrier, and other unknown breeds.  Yes, this breed is one of the several breeds sometimes colloquially referred to as a Pitbull.  However, the American Pitbull is a different, but related breed. 

And whatever Bentley is, he is a sugar lump, that's for sure.  We're so happy he's with us.  He makes me laugh.  Now that our "honeymood phase" is over, I should be back to blogging more ;-)  And now, for any of you animal lovers, I'll be able to include regular pics of the new guy.

Sooooo sick!

Hello, my friends! I'm droppig by to let you know that I'm still alive! Barely. But still alive! I got a killer virus over Christmas that really got the better of me. I'm finally on the mend and on antibiotics, because it turned into a nasty infection. I'll be back soon, once my brain can come up with anything worth blogging about. I don't know why I spared you my illness-induced ranting, because my usual fare isn't much different. So, never fear, I'll be back with some non-illness-induced ranting soon enough!